just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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