TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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