the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Randomize
