On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
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