the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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