Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Randomize
