He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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