They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
