he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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