so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
He felt like a one man threesome
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
