you're like a bully in the Christmas story
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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