Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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