2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
