Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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