thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
