D3 body, D1 cock
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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