I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
