Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
