I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
