i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
We had to coat check the pizza.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
