Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
