i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Randomize
