so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
