Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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