i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
