His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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