Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
You dont lie about slip and slides
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
