Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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