At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
