you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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