she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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