He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
operation harelip BJ is a go
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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