I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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