Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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