I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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