her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
