I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
