kristin has been a bad kristin
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
