Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
