i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
He? As in you personified your dick?
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
