It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
