apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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