i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
