Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
