what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize