bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
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