and you said cock pushups were impossible
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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