Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I got inside last night via doggy door
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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