he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
