I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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